Wow!!  2016!  It's been THAT long?  I'm a totally different person now.  I really have been wanting to put my thoughts out there again and finally have had the time to check and see if my blogger account is still active.  Here it is.  Here I am.  

Truth be told, life has been a whirlwind from January 2020 on.  I had my 3rd child, he is a double rainbow.  It wasn't something that we were planning on.  But I got my health back and BOOM it happened.  When he was approaching 2 years old our pediatricians office was concerned.  They didn't say the A word - but deep down I knew that's what was alarming them.  Since I decided to accept reality we have experienced lots of therapies and hard days.   It took me some time to be open to ABA therapy and to find a place without a waiting list.  This is the reason I'm able to type this out now- we have found a place and it was needed 2 YEARS ago- If I'm going to be completely honest.  

This little guy has opened our eyes to so much.  My older kids will be better people, and my husband and I as well.  At this time we are unable to go out to eat together or to attend church together as a family.  I really miss doing things with all of us.  But I have HOPE that the time will come.  Having HOPE is essential to having happiness and sanity.  Hope and Humility really are two things I aim for each moment, each day.  

I think it may help me to type out how I feel, what I'm grateful for and what we are encountering on our journey with a non-speaking 4 year old and two much older kids.  

Many blessings!  

Grateful: In Thanksgiving for my new Neighbor

Our families are certainly of the utmost importance (or should be) to each and every one of us.  We take care of each other and grow together and experience the highs and lows of our earthly existence as a clan, a tribe, we share a home, we share a name, this forges an amazing bond.  Families do need support and it can come from different places.   This support is crucial for the survival of our families and for our sanity, healthy marriages, happy childhoods, and homes.

Right after I was married I packed up my apartment and moved from St Louis to Dallas because that's where my husband got a job.  I left behind a very large extended family.  My Mom is the eldest of 8 and my Dad the eldest of 3.  At the time I think just about everyone was living in St Louis.  Most of my Moms siblings had 4 kids or more and I grew up with cousins who were like siblings.  When I left I took all of the family gatherings for granted.  I really didn't appreciate the big Thanksgiving Feasts and Christmas Day - in which EVERYONE was present.  As a child I had always had this wonderful community of extended family.  When I left as an adult I was looking forward to living in a new city with my beloved.

It didn't happen immediately but I began to miss all of the family that I had left behind.  When I came back to the Catholic church I would sometimes feel like I was with them all again at Sunday Mass.  I made friends who showed me the love of Christ.  I joined an amazing community of homeschooling families who provided incredible support and friendship for our home school journey.  When I did go  back home for a visit, it was fruitful and the love that my family and I have for each other had only increased.  My baby cousins were not babies anymore, now they have their own families and are beautiful adults.  My nieces and nephews are growing quickly and doing so well in sports, but I never get to see games.  When my Mom comes to visit we don't fight like we did when I was a teenager.  We have so much fun together and cry when it's time for her to go home.

Sometimes I go through my days, weeks, months and years wishing that I had someone who was like family that could just help me a little tiny bit.  I'm like a lot of people, I don't really want to ask for help, but I would ask my Mom or some family that I feel close to.  Sometimes I don't even really know what I need help with, I just know I need some support.

A few months ago, a neighbor of mine told me that they were moving and that the house they are currently in would go up for rent in a few months.  I was so sad to hear this.  She was an amazing neighbor who went above and beyond to help us in times of need.  I didn't want to see her go.
It occurred to me that I should pray for new neighbors.  I started to be very specific, praying for a homeschooling Catholic family to move in.  I got my kids to join in, and they prayed too.  We must have been praying for 4-5 months.  And about two months ago I learned that one of my Catholic FB friends was moving into this neighborhood!  She wasn't moving into the house directly across from me, but it's still in my community and we can walk there easily.

Simple words cannot express the gratitude that I feel to have her here.  From the time she got the keys to her house she has had an open door policy.  Our kids love to play together! She has let my kids play there when I have a Dr appointment.  She's fun loving and happy and grateful all rolled up into one. Did I mention that she has two teenage daughters who babysit?  We have been able to make date night a reality again.   But most of all, she's that friend that you love to sit on the couch and chat with, about anything!

In his wisdom, God knew that I needed a friend close by, someone that understands me because they have similar struggles and a Catholic worldview.

I also want to encourage anyone out there who may be needing a little help, even if you're not sure what that is to reach out to your Sisters in Christ.  You can bless others by allowing them to assist you in some small way.

Adult Swim

Today was among the best days of the summer of 2016 thus far!  The kids and I ventured to The Texas Pool and met up with several different homeschooling friends.  This is the third year that my family has been enjoying this epic-Texas-shaped bit of paradise in Plano.  They went one time and they were hooked on the slides, the friendly people, the community, the list goes on and on.  But today I wanted to write a little bit about something that actually comes from a conversation I had with two Mom-friends yesterday.  The conversation revolved around going from an adult-centered culture to a child-centered culture.  I thought about our family read-aloud the night before, "Farmer Boy".  I recalled how Almanzo was the youngest and at Christmas dinner he had to wait for the adults to eat first, it was hard for him to be patient but he was.  Almanzo would have never talked back to his father or disrespected him.  Such is the result of an adult centered culture where good behavior and following rules are expected of children.  I put in my two cents in with regard to what I read in Farmer Boy and then expressed that I felt like my parents generation was much more adult centered than the current generation is, I asked how it could change so quickly.  One Mom suggested that that this is a direct result of the contraceptive mentality and that we are taught to only have a small amount of children so that we can focus all of our time, energy and finances on those few.  I thought about this a lot last night and then a memory came back to me from the pool last year.  I recall a young life guard approached me, he asked if I would want to partake in a 15 minute adult swim and make the kids get out of the water.  I told him that no thanks,  I wouldn't want to make the kids upset.  I could recall a memory from my childhood in which my Mom partook in adult swim, (very gleefully too.)  All the kids stood around and whimpered and whined.  I remember my Mom with this HUGE smile on her face swimming laps.

Fast forward to today, the kids were swimming, we had been at the pool for about 3 hours and the lifeguards kicked all of the kids out of the pool and I heard the words "adult swim".  I jumped out of my lounger brought up yesterdays conversation and told my friends that even if I didn't want to swim, I was going to jump in because kids need to be taught to respect their parents need for fun and exercise too.  I freestyle-raced my friend Bobbi and became breathless.  The kids stood and watched us like they had never seen such a sight.  Some complained but not all.  There was room to move about and get a quick workout in.  For a short period of time the pool was serene and calm.  But soon after it returned to it's normal state of bedlam with the kids jumping in and being their boisterous selves.  What a great lesson for me, to take those breaks when they're offered to you.  Not only is it good for my mind, body and soul, it's good for my kids to see me have fun and to respect my need for it as well.